Had first CBT appointment today. It was really good – my therapist is a really nice bloke who reminds me a bit of Captain Mainwaring from Dad’s army! We may do typical CBT for PTSD (reliving stuff and processing it) or we may do something called EMDR which is all brainy and cool – but either or- I feel positive about both and am sure he can help me rewire my daft brain out of this.
Today’s session just mainly chatted about my experience – what triggered flashbacks etc etc. but he did ask this question? What would you say to someone else telling you their experience?
And I said “I’d give them a great big hug”
And I would. If it wasn’t me but someone I knew telling me their story/my story. Then I would give them and great big hug and tell them it wasn’t their fault and I would love and support them as much as possible. I would also want them to believe me when I told them it wasn’t their fault and they had nothing to feel guilty or a failure for.
Erm. Bingo!? I don’t do to myself EXACTLY what I would do to my hypothetical friend in same situation. Eh?! Tsk me.
So this week I am mostly going to be focusing on giving myself a hug.
(P.S. There was some other stuff on perfectionism, notions of motherhood and whatnot that we chatted about but shall save for another post as quite frankly hugging yourself makes it near impossible to type. )